Dearest Alkeyvia,
Everything that you are and everything that you will become is because of your relationship with Jesus. It is very important that you know that having a relationship with Him is the most important relationship that you will ever have. Although, your mother and brothers will offer you advice, He alone is the ONLY one that can direct you down the right path. Hold on to that relationship no matter what because He is all you will ever need. He will be your provider in times of lack, your comforter in times of sorrow, your strength in times of weakness, your peace in times of trouble, your healer in times of sickness and your biggest supporter in times of triumph. He loves you like no man ever will.
You may look around right now and all you see is poverty, drugs and pain but if you will keep pressing forward and trusting God I promise you that Jesus will take you to places that you never dreamed of. Remember you can do ALL things through Christ!
You WILL make mistakes in life and do things that you aren't exactly proud of, but do not allow those things to have you living in fear. Know that God says in his word that NOTHING that we could possibly do will ever separate us from his love. Stand on Romans 8 verses 38-39 "And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord."
Do not be so hard on yourself! Forgive yourself for the mistakes you will make and for the things you will do that you aren't too proud of. Learn from them and move forward. Do not beat yourself up or dwell on the past, it will not define you or the woman that you will become. Know that you serve a FORGIVING not a condemning God. Jesus says in His word that we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God and that He will forgive our wickedness and remember our sins no more. If God can forgive you, then you MUST forgive yourself and leave your past behind you.
Love who you see when you look in the mirror. Do not ever be afraid or ashamed of who you are. Yes you will make mistakes but you are a child of the most high and You ARE a Proverbs 31 woman and don't you ever forget that. See yourself as God sees you; as chosen, set apart, approved, and accepted into heaven. Knowing who you are and setting standards for yourself will be an integral part of the woman you will become.
Despite your bothers efforts to protect you, your heart will be broken. But at the end of every relationship rejoice in knowing that you dodged a bullet! Know that he was not God's will for your life and move on! The man that God has for you will love you like Jesus loves His church. He will be willing to lay down his life so that you can live an abundant one.
Life will not always go as planned hun! You won't be married and done having kids at 29, you won't go to law school when you want and you won't get a job right out of law school. There will be too many times when you won't get what YOU want, But all that is OK!! You will realize that what you need will be far better than what you want. Remember that the plan that God has for you is far better than any plan you can ever have for yourself.
If you remember nothing else I have said, remember to be patient, to forgive yourself when you make mistakes and most importantly, TRUST God!
Love,
Your 28 year old self!
